Farmers Market Dinner Challenge: May Edition

Ever since I moved to Portland I have been told that I have to go to the Portland Farmers Market at Portland State University. Portland has farmers markets just about everyday of the week during the warmer months, but the granddaddy of them all is on Saturday on the PSU campus. I had lived here nine months and failed to go just about every weekend up until a few weeks ago when I mentally committed myself to going. 

I was overwhelmed by it all. Its very similar to the Dane County Farmers Market in Madison, WI. It has a few more stands, with many of them serving ready-to-eat food due to a lack of restaurants on the PSU campus. I didn't see anyone playing a drum, guitar, or recorder for money. There was also no one inside the market selling something that could not be consumed (minus the honey people selling beeswax candles). 

Note: If you're looking for something crafty, your place to be is the Saturday Market. Or if you're looking for a basket, go out on the sidewalk a hundred feet outside the main entrance of the farmers market grounds. That is where I spotted one man selling all sorts of baskets and I overheard a potential customer asking about where they were from. (I felt as though I should have been looking for Portlandia cameras.) 

My first trip to the PSU Farmers Market I made a critical mistake; I did not go in with a plan. I passed over mountains of beautiful produce and arrived too late to find the legendary Hood strawberries. Rather my friend and I sampled sausages and cheeses, including a vegan smoked gouda (I know for certain now that no matter how many times someone swears it tastes just like cheese, it doesn't). That day I managed to pick up a kielbasa from Olympic Provisions, a well-known sausage producer in Portland, and a cow's milk cheese called Juniper from Ancient Heritage Dairy. You can take a girl out of Sconnie, but you take the Sconnie out of the girl. 

The RD side of me was fairly disappointed with myself after my first trip. Then I swore to myself that next time would be different, next time I would have a plan. This week I had decided I was going to make a farmers market dinner for two for under $50. Many local restaurants boast/ warn you that their menu varies based on what they can find at the farmers market. They then charge you an arm and a leg as a reward for them going out there early, planning a menu, and having a sous chef prepare for you what they felt was the best of the market. Considering it was going to be a typical rainy day in Portland on Saturday, why not try to do it myself?

The market opened at 8:30 and I found myself there about 15 minutes after it opened. It was raining lightly as I made my way to the first booth with Hood strawberries. (I have this quirk where I feel pressured at farmers markets, panic, and buy from the first vendor I see selling what I want.) I ended up paying $4 for a pint of strawberries. I then turned around a saw another vendor selling strawberries for $3. I rationalized that I didn't see one other vendor use the word "Hood" by "strawberry" so I continued to allow myself to think that I did not get ripped off. 

The next stand I stopped at had golden beets. I had maybe had beets three times in my life before coming to Portland. Through my co-workers obsession with all things beet-related (mainly beet martinis, beet infused vodkas, and beet salad), I have come to appreciate them. I had never seen golden beets before and decided to actually talk to the vendor. I learned from him that golden beets are sweeter than red ones and don't stain as much. I also learned that beet greens are much like chard, the only difference is that chard was bred not to bulb like beets so the greens grow faster. I picked up bunch ($3.50) and went on my way. 

I walked along and tried a bourbon chicken liver mousse from Chopped. It was melt-in-your-mouth delicious, but I didn't want to spend $8 of my dinner fund on it so I moved on. I then spotted a stand selling asparagus and I had an idea of making asparagus soup. This time rather than buying something at the first place I saw it, I went along to see if I could find it somewhere else. I then passed by a hard cider stand offering tastings of their award- winning ciders. I considered stopping, but I wanted to see where I ended up before I bought a beverage to go with dinner.

The next task was finding a protein for dinner. Do I go with fish or meat? If I go with meat, what do I want? There is always chicken, beef, and pork. But what about buffalo, yak, rabbit, lamb or duck? Minus the buffalo and lamb, I have no experience cooking the other game meats so those were out. I tend to eat a lot of chicken and that made me less inclined to purchase it there. I also wasn't really feeling a seafood to go with my beet salad, even though it would have went well with the asparagus soup. I ended up consciously committing myself to beef. 

I walked passed a few stands selling grass-fed/ pastured-raised beef. I finally stopped at Sexton Ranches from Haines, OR. They were advertising tenderloin filets for $20 a pound. I was cautious because the first time I bought a grass fed flank steak at a farmers market it was $20 a pound and the smallest this particular vendor had was 1.5 pounds. I ended up spending $30 on a flank steak and blowing over my half my budget there. This time I was going tell the vendor how much I wanted and see if they could make that happen rather than taking what they handed me.  As it turns out, they only had pieces that were about .3 to .4 pounds. Perfect for me and my budget, I picked up two steaks for about $15.  

Sexton Ranches was also one of the first booths where I was getting the hang of the farmer/ rancher/ vendor- customer interaction. She congratulated me on making out in the rain and how she would not be there herself had she not had to work. Really though, Madison has had farmers markets on 30 degree days. If anyone should be congratulated, it should be those market goers. 

If I was going to be making dinner, I really didn't want to put the effort into making dessert. Why even attempt it when someone else at the market has already mastered that skill? I had this idea to have an apple or pear pie topped with melted smoked gouda. I had tried the smoked gouda, non-vegan, a couple weeks prior. On my way to the cheese stand, I stopped at the Packer Orchards stand to pick up a small apple pie sweetened with pears for $5. I then went to Willamette Valley Cheese to get their smoked gouda for $7. 

I only had a couple things left on my list. Onions and asparagus. I stopped at a near by stand where I found sweet onions for $2.50. I asked the vendors there if they had any asparagus, which they did not. However, the woman recommended I stop at Viridian Farms, which had "the best" asparagus at the market. I made my way to where she directed me and low and behold, that was the first stand I spotted with asparagus. The asparagus was $3.00 per bunch there, the same as most other places.

If you are tracking my costs, so far this meal is $36.00. I did not include the cost of strawberries since I'm not planning on using them for dinner. At this point the dinner menu consists of a beet salad, asparagus soup, and steak. For dessert I have an apple pie topped with smoked gouda. Now what to drink... I know!

I meandered over to the cider stand, where the gentleman there ask if I was now ready to try some cider. (He must have seen me pass by earlier.) I told him about what I was doing for dinner and after asking if he could come over, he had me try a few ciders that he thought would go with the meal. A couple others stopped to try what he had and I was able to taste 6 different offerings from Anthem and Wandering Aegnus Ciders. I ended up selecting the Pear Cider from Anthem. It is usually $6 a bottle (or 2 for $10) at the market, but he gave it to me for $5. I now had a complete meal for a grand total of $41.00. Below you can a see a picture of my purchases. (The honeycrisp apple was also not part of dinner, it was part of my breakfast.) 

The before. 

There were only a couple things I needed to make dinner that I did not get at the farmers market and had around the kitchen. Those items were olive oil, lemon, cashews, carrots, garlic, and ground ginger. These items were for the beet salad and the asparagus soup. Here are the recipes I used for these items. 

Beet Salad

What You Need:

4 Medium Beets

1/4 cup Sweet Onions, sliced

Juice of 1/2 Lemon

1 T Olive Oil

1 1/2 tsp Ground Ginger

Salt and Pepper to taste

What to Do:

Preheat the oven to 450 degrees. Wash the beets and cut the greens and tips off of the beets. In a small pan, put down a sheet of aluminum foil. Place the beets in the center of it and fold up the sides to make a pouch. Roast the beets for about one hour (you should be able to easily pierce them with a fork). Remove the beets from the oven and open the pouch to allow them to cool. 

In a small container whisk together the oil, lemon juice, onion, and ginger.

When the beets are cool enough, peel their skin off. Then slice the beets half, then each half into four pieces. The pieces should be about a 1/2 inch long and 1/4 inch wide. Put the beets in the container with the oil mixture. Salt and pepper the salad to taste. Put a lid on the container and give the container a shake to coat the beets. Place the container in the refrigerator to chill and allow the salad to marinate for at least one hour. 

Asparagus Soup

What You Need:

1 bunch of Asparagus

2 cloves of Garlic

1/4 cup of Sweet Onions, sliced

2 cups of Vegetable Broth, warm (I made my own using 3 cups of water, the woody ends of the asparagus, 2 sweet onions, 1/2 cup of chopped carrots, one cup of sliced beet greens, and salt and pepper to taste.)  

1 T of Raw Cashews

1/2 Lemon, zested

Salt and Pepper to taste

What to Do:

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Wash the asparagus well, cut off the woody ends, and place the trimmed asparagus on a lightly greased pan or a pan lined with parchment paper. Roast the asparagus for about 10 minutes. Remove from the oven, flip the asparagus, add the onion and garlic, and roast for another 10 minutes. If the asparagus is thinner, you should be able to roast it in about 5 minutes on each side.  

In a blender, add 1 T of cashews to 1/2 cup of the vegetable broth. Blend until smooth. 

After asparagus is done cooking select a few pieces to use as a garnish. Place the rest of the asparagus on a cutting board and cut it into 2 inch long pieces. Place half of the asparagus in the blender with one cup of the vegetable broth and blend until smooth. Continue this process with the rest of the asparagus, onion, garlic, and vegetable broth. Add salt and pepper to taste.  

Pour the soup into bowls. If the soup seems fibrous, feel free to strain it with a sieve. Top each bowl with about a 1/2 a tablespoon of lemon zest. Serve warm. 

The finished meal minus the pie (it didn't last long enough to be pictured). That steak was as tender as it looks. 

 

                        

Nanner Walnut Pancakes

I had been surviving on eggs (in just about every way, shape and form) for the last few months for breakfast. Needless to say, this past Saturday I was craving a change in my morning routine. This meant one of two things. I could either a.) succumb to Voodoo Doughnuts being my backyard and get a ridiculously topped and injected hunk of pure carbohydrates or b.) experiment in the kitchen.

Fortunately I had an overripe banana and an idea.  (A dangerous combination, but not nearly as dangerous as fried dough.) After a little bit of research I made Nanner Walnut Pancakes. This recipe is super quick and the batter was thick enough that it didn't spread and merge into a cell-undergoing-mitosis shape when I dumped (yes "dumped" and not "poured") it in the skillet. 

What You Need:

The ingredients (I made a half batch, the recipe is for 4- 6 pancakes.)

2 Eggs

2 Egg Whites

2 Bananas, overripe

1/4 cup of Walnuts, chopped

3 Tablespoons of Coconut Flour

1/2 teaspoon of Baking Powder

1 teaspoon of Vanilla Extract

Cooking Spray or Coconut Oil

What To Do:

In a medium bowl, mash the bananas with a fork. Next mix in the vanilla, egg, and egg whites. (If you want to forgo the egg whites, use 3 whole eggs. If you prefer to cut out the egg yolks, use 6 egg whites.) Stir in the coconut flour and baking powder until slightly lumpy. Last, stir in the walnuts.

In the pan it goes!

Spray a medium skillet with cooking spray. (If cooking spray is not your style, you can also melt a 1/2 Tablespoon of coconut oil for cooking.) Heat the pan over medium heat. Pour/ dump a portion of the batter into the pan. Cook the pancake until the top of it is bubbled and looks "dry." Flip and continue cooking on the other side until the bottom side is browned. Remove from pan and put it on a plate. Continue this process until you are out of batter or made all you care to eat.

Once your plate looks like this, grab a fork and get ready for some nutty, nanner goodness! These pancakes are so moist you don't need butter or syrup (especially if you use coconut oil for cooking them). Added bonus: you won't want to nap after eating them!


   

Toothers

A political battle is brewing. The yard signs are up and campaign commercials are on the airwaves. The battle is pitting neighbor against neighbor. It's not over a controversial candidiate or hot button issue.

It's over water. More specifically, adding fluoride to the water. Opponents to fluoridation have been given the nickname "Toothers" (not to be confused with "Birthers" demanding President Obama's birth certificate).

Fluoride is well-known to help strengthen teeth. It can be found naturally in water, but many water  municipalities add it when it isn't naturally found in the water supply. The Environmental Protection Agency is responsible for regulating fluoride in drinking water and has established a Maximum Contaminant Level (MCL) of 4 milligrams per Liter. It has been shown that some people who drink water for many years with fluoride above this MCL may experience bone disease and children may be at risk for mottled teeth.

In 2010, the Center for Disease Control reported that 73.9% of the drinking water in the United States was fluoridated. Currently, Portland is the largest city water municipality in which the water is not fluoridated. Last September the City Council unanimously voted to fluoridate the water, but a petition with 22,000 signatures took the measure out of the City Council's hands and onto the May 2014 ballot. The council then decided to fast forward this measure and added it to a special election ballot for this May. (For a more in depth look at the history of this issue, take a look at this piece from the Willamette Weekly.)

I had never heard of a city that didn't fluoridate the water until I had moved here. In fact, I was certain fluoridated water was universal. Then I learned from my dentist that the fight for fluoridation was just getting warmed up.

Many Toothers believe that there are health effects that fluoride can have besides bone disease when it consumed in large amounts. Some of these health concerns include dry skin, low thyroid function, and cold hands and feet. Toothers believe that any amount of fluoride in drinking water is hazardous to one's health.  

Putting this in perspective, our bodies are exposed to hundreds of environmental "hazards" daily. It is difficult to tell exactly what in our environment is going to be the cause of any health issue. This is why many studies that suggest people quit smoking/ lose weight/ reduce alcohol consumption add the line that doing any one of those things "may reduce the risk" of developing this, that, or the other thing. However, doing any of those things does not automatically eliminate the chance of you ever being diagnosed with a disease.

I am not by any means saying that fluoridated water is equal to smoking tobacco products or excessive alcohol consumption, but rather there is a good chance that fluoride is not the sole cause of some (if not all) of the health issues described above.

As far as I am concerned, this is a public health issue. It has been shown that many people in Portland have poor dental health. Some of this is by their own choice, but for many it may be the fact they do not have access to the tools for proper care. It has been brought up by Toothers that more should be invested in education programs promoting dental care. One example of the education approach in action is the campaign to wear seatbelts. When you look at the statistics, however, people are still killed due to being involved in car accidents and not wearing their seatbelt. If the education approach worked, wouldn't this have ended?

This is a picture of tooth decay. In line with the Toothers train of thought, if everyone saw this they would take better care of their teeth. I mean, images work so well for cigarette cessation, right?

This May the voters in Portland have the ability to improve the dental situation of many community members. It is my hope that the voters in Portland do not take this opportunity lightly. In the meantime, I'll be investing in a fluoride mouth rinse.

Post Paleo Review

Please excuse the delay on my review of the Paleo challenge. I went on vacation a couple weeks ago and I am still working on getting back into a routine. After last night's Easter candy binge, I think I'm there. Note: That was a week ago and I was still not ready to write this. 

I officially completed the Paleo Challenge on March 25th. I was going to do one additional day to try Paleo while travelling, but that was the first day my first real vacation in over five years. Five years. Real vacation meaning no wedding, birthday party, move across the country, etc. involved. Earlier that day I could barely choke down a chicken breast for lunch. At that very point I reached my meat intake limit. After that my thought was, "Like heck I am going to be on a Paleo challenge when I am going to finally have a chance to relax."

Now, I did have one memorable semi-Paleo meal in Vegas. Mr. NN was super excited when he found that Hot 'n Juicy Crawfish was in Las Vegas. He had watched a Man Vs. Food episode about this restaurant and was immediately smitten with it. I was a little unsure what we were walking into, but I had a vision from "Beasts of the Southern Wild" involving a bayou feast. At Hot 'n Juicy, you order your food by the pound and then choose what seasoning you would like. I opted for a pound of shrimp with their signature Hot 'n Juicy seasoning. A little while later, a plastic bag was dropped in front of me filled with shrimp. Rather than standing on my chair like Hushpuppy flexing my muscles, I looked more like this:

That, my friends, is the look of me attempting to hide my terror upon the realization I need to rip apart my food to make it edible (by my standards). I still cringe when I see that little guy with his eyes bulging out. I probably ate a half pound of shrimp by the time I beheaded, de-legged, peeled, and deveined my shrimp. This was not my type of dining experience, but Mr. NN was completely into it- up to his elbows in crawfish juices. My favorite part of this meal were the corn fritters. No de-assembly (or looking my food in its dead eyes) required.     

Now let's review my goals for the Paleo Challenge:

• Increased energy
• Better cold sensitivity management
• Bikini- ready shape

Did I reach my goals? In the order of my goals listed above, the answers are : No, no, and kind of.

I didn't have more energy and I was still pretty caffeine dependent during the challenge. For me, "caffeine dependent" is at least two cups of coffee (or tea) a day. I know many people will scoff at this idea because for some people this is called "breakfast." But for me, I never had a morning routine involving caffeine consumption until this year. Not to say I don't enjoy it, I just want to be able to function without it. The week after my vacation, however, I didn't even need a cup of green tea in the morning. I therefore attribute the lack of energy not to my non-Paleo diet (or to Paleo for that matter), but to my extreme burnout. A couple weeks after Spring break and I am still consuming less caffeine.

My cold sensitivity is better, but that is likely because it is warmer outside. I also wear more layers when I'm cold. Amazing what that combination can do for body temperature regulation.

Now let me explain the "kind of" for bikini- ready shape. I already have a solid workout routine and can be found in the gym most days of the week. I definitely have an athletic build, although my build has no correlation with any ability to play sports. (Just ask anyone who I have played recreational volleyball or softball with.) In any case, after starting Paleo I noticed I was way less bloated.  All the work I had been putting in at the gym was becoming more noticeable. Mr. NN even asked when I put on my bikini if I had lost weight. Which no, I had not (but I did lose excess intestinal air). Unfortunately the only photo I have from Vegas involving a bikini is the one below, but it pretty much sums up my break so it will do.

       Happiness is poolside in the sunshine.  

Now that I have completed the challenge, I have been asked if I will continue on it.

The short answer: I will likely follow some parameters of Paleo, but not all of it.

The long answer: There are things that I liked about Paleo and things that I didn't. I definitely do not think that beans and peanuts are detrimental to my gut or my health. My immune system has been incredible this past cold and flu season, in spite of the fact I work in schools and primarily ate beans as my protein source this past winter.

Not once during the challenge was I able to get my recommended amount of calcium intake from food alone. I didn't even get enough with a multivitamin and mineral added in. That all being noted, I'm also going to have dairy.

When it comes to grains, prior to the challenge Mr. NN was on a meal plan that only permitted starchy foods (i.e. grains and potatoes) after workouts. Many of our meals had been grainless due to this and it really is not as difficult as it sounds. You just need to make sure you fill in the starch-void on your plate with more vegetables and fruit (or in some cases, meat).

I will not, however, avoid grains like the plague after this experience. Whole grains also have a lot of benefits that should not be disregarded. Whole grains have insoluble fiber to help your body get rid of unnecessary cholesterol. Insoluble fiber also helps you to feel fuller and pushes food particles (and what it becomes) through your intestines faster. There are also many things in life I enjoy that involve grains- such as cupcakes, beer, and cheeseburgers. I like being able to enjoy these items every-so-often and don't feel it necessary to deny myself these items.

A few Paleo Diet experts, including Dr. Cordain, recommend a 85% Paleo Diet lifestyle. This means all but three of the meals you have in a given week are Paleo. For those other three meals you can pretty much have whatever your heart desires.

Recently I listened to an interview with Dr. Eaton, the first person recognized with creating the Caveman Diet back in the 1980s. (Dr. Courdain recognizes Dr. Eaton as being an inspiration.) The interview was done by a  die-hard Paleo fanatic and he seemed floored when Dr. Eaton told him that ate "forbidden" foods (i.e. beans, dairy, and grains). If the founder of the Caveman Diet allows himself to have these things, I'm fairly certain it is okay for me (and everyone else) to have them too.    

Nice to Finally Meat You

In Portland there is no shortage of culinary adventures. From restaurants to food carts there is a plethora of places to try at every corner. After falling off the mark last Saturday, I decided to fully commit to finding a purely Paleo meal outside of my kitchen.

A friend recommended that I try the Cultured Caveman. The Cultured Caveman is a food cart with two locations in the NE and SE neighborhoods. For being a food cart they have a pretty nice website to go along with it. It not only has the menu posted on it, but a short nutrition breakdown for most items as well. You can even check out a couple recipes on it. 

Mr. NN and I ventured out on a sunny Saturday after our workouts to give it a try. We visited the one in SE, which was right across the street from a popular natural/ local foods store. This location had a single table in front of the cart near the bustling intersection and tent in back with a few more tables that offered a more secluded dining experience. But enough about the location, let's get down to the food!  

For the main dish we both opted for the Grass Fed All Meat Chili and Caveman Coffee. For a side, I selected the Beet and Walnut Salad while Mr. NN tried the Ginger Carrot Kale Salad.  You can see our selections pictured off to the right. Our grand total came to $20, not bad for a lunch with high quality ingredients.  

I love a good chili and I have been disappointed in what I have found in Portland so far. That was until I had the chili here. It was full of flavor and there were large chunks of tender meat rather than minuscule meat-like crumbles floating about. The portion size was perfect for me, but Mr. NN could have used a larger size. 

The Ginger Carrot Kale Salad was just the right mix of crisp vegetables and ginger flavor. While the Beet and Walnut Salad was described as containing jicama, but I didn't find any. The jicama was either really well hidden because it had absorbed the color from the beets and carrots or jicama was simply not in it. If it was left out, I don't think it was a major loss (to me jicama doesn't have much taste anyway). The bright salad still had a nice earthy flavor balance. 

The Caveman Coffee was delicious. There is no shortage of good coffee in Portland and One Drop Coffee is no exception. It was perfectly iced and not watered down. If you're interested, you can order their cold brew online and play barista at home. I'm not sure what made this coffee "caveman" though. Maybe because you could order it with coconut milk or heavy cream. 

All in all, I would give my meal a 4 out of 5 caveman clubs. I'm withholding one club due to the fact we were both hungry an hour later. One way to avoid that would be to order a little extra. For a perfectly Paleo (and tasty) meal give the Cultured Caveman a try.        

Week Three: Cave Kids and a Gluten Reaction

Last Saturday I attended the Oregon School Nutrition Association conference. The attendees are exactly what you might expect; from school nutrition directors to your typical lunch lady, all of them are really passionate about school food- the good, the not so good, and the kids really touch this stuff? My group was there to be educated on everything from new legislation affecting school meals to how to pick ripe produce. Maybe we'd make a few new connections along the way as well.  

First, we all gathered in a large hall while a pep squad held a "flag ceremony" (which we found out was code for the Pledge of Allegiance) and then the board members of various organizations were introduced. A motivational speaker who you could have sworn was about to have an aneurysm later outdid the pep squad's pep. Midway through his presentation, after he threw himself onto numerous women yelling, "Get happy!" while rubbing his chest in their face, he disclosed that he had a stroke about 10 years ago. Shocking.

But this wasn't the excitement that most of the child nutrition professionals were waiting in anticipation for. A floor above us, vendors scurried about setting up booths, warming samples, and practicing their selling points. The vendor showcase was the crown jewel event of the day.

In case you have been living under rock and/or do not have a child in school, you may not be aware of the changes this year to school lunches. I will save the explanation of the government and school meals for another blog. Long story short (for the purpose of this post) is that many companies have been reformulating what they already make to sell to schools in hopes of holding on to that part of the market. School meal entrees are generally made up of two of the three components required to be a reimbursable meal. The components tend to be grain, protein, or a combination of the two. The curveball in school meal entrees is that cheese constitutes a protein, not dairy.

Since the vendors usually bring samples, the conference did not provide a mid-day meal. Meaning I was left to forge what I could for a meal from what the vendors had. Generally it is pretty easy to eat yourself silly at one of these events. However this Paleo challenge increased the difficulty of this task. School meals are far from being considered Paleo with grain, legumes, and dairy being major components of school meals. Most of the meats I found were breaded. Some of the meats I found, that weren't coated in breading, didn't look quite like meat. Then some places were promoting their cheese/ bean/ peanut butter filled products. None of these things were considered Paleo either.

This left beef jerky, salsa, and frozen fruit. I ended up having a lot of fruit: as in sugar-high, blood-thickening amount of fruit.  At one point my stomach was turning due to the amount of sugar I had consumed, so I tried a questionable meatball in a "citrus, ancho chile sauce." I spit it out. I am highly appreciative that my school district does not serve mystery meat like this.

I never thought it was possible to get a hangover from fruit. By the time I got home I was feeling semi-nauseous from the amount of sugar in my body and was in desperate need of grease.

Since it was St. Patrick's weekend, I grabbed a friend and we went out to an Irish pub for whiskey and grease. We first split a plate of fries, which helped the sugar to salt/ fat ratio in my blood, but it wasn't quite enough. I needed more. This was when Mr. NN met up with us and was in need of dinner. That was my ticket to continue on my quest for grease.

I had been fantasizing about bread for the last few days, what could it hurt giving in and having a reuben? It was just one sandwich, not heroin. I could have gone with the bangers and mash, which would have been more aligned with Paleo, but I was planning on having that the next day. I could have also asked not to have the bread or cheese and just a pile of corned beef and sauerkraut on a plate. But if I was going to have just one non-Paleo meal in three weeks, I might as well fully embrace it.  

Within a few minutes a perfectly grilled sandwich, with a tantalizing menagerie of melted cheese and dressing oozing down the sides, was set down before me.  I was more excited than the motivational speaker I saw earlier. I held myself back from tackling the server with unbridled happiness.  Just so you have a visual, the sandwich (pictured left) is not one that I had eaten, but it looked just as beautiful.

I inhaled half of the sandwich in what felt like seconds. I could have stopped at half of the sandwich, but this was my first sandwich in a long time. I didn't need the other half, the first half of the sandwich needed to be reunited with the other half... in my belly. Down the hatch it went.

After the entire sandwich was ingested I was in pain. At first I thought it was because I had eaten myself silly. But after an hour my stomach was distended and there was a lot of gurgling going on.

My body was rejecting the sandwich. Nooooooooo. 

I have noticed since starting Paleo I have been less bloated, but this was a little ridiculous. Do I think that gluten caused this? It certainly could be. Obviously my body is not used it since it has been a few weeks since I had a full serving of grains, let alone gluten. But as one RD friend pointed out, our intestinal lining is replaced every 3 to 5 days. Because I have went longer than that without any grains my body simply isn't used to processing it. It probably didn't help that I had two slices of refined bread rather than easing myself back into eating grains.

Do I think gluten is the devil and that people should avoid it at all costs? No, absolutely not. I should have been more careful when making my dinner decision. Everyone should also be sure to choose whole grains over refined grains. In this frame of thought, if I thought that I had to avoid gluten the rest of my life due to the way it made me feel I would have to avoid fruit too. Think about it, I managed to eat myself sick on fruit but I know that blueberries aren't evil. These both illustrate the point that everything, including fruit, in moderation.

The Irish, Cave-made Cupcake

Cupcake: cup-cake (noun) a small cake baked in a cuplike mold.

A cupcake is generally meant for one person to consume. Although if you go to someplace like Gigi's, one cupcake is large enough to be shared. (However, I'm not going to say that finishing one by yourself is impossible and I can attest to that.)

Lately, I have had an insatiable cupcake craving. Partially because I have yet to find a cupcake cafe to act as my safe haven here in Portland after a hectic week. Mainly because I am attempting to be fully Paleo and haven't had one in a long time.

After spending a good part of the week researching Portland cupcake stores, I was inspired to be more pro-active. Of course there are gluten-free bakeries here, but why not try to do a little of my own baking? This was also my first time baking with something other than wheat flour.

In the spirit of St. Patrick's Day, I decided I wanted something "Irish." Being the Naughty Nutritionist, I thought Irish cream would be a good flavor to work with. I also am a big fan of Bailey's in chai lattes- a concoction I discovered on a cold, snowy night a few years ago- so that is where the chai idea came from. But as much as I like the color green, I declined on adding food coloring.

I will forewarn you that these are not your typical cupcakes. The recipe I created was a mash-up of a cupcake recipe and a paleo muffin recipe. My cupcake does have a moist, spongey characteristic to them similar to most paleo mock-grain foods. They also aren't nearly as sweet, so it could easily pass for a breakfast muffin (minus frosting).

Bailey's Chai-Spiced, Gluten-Free Cupcakes
Makes approximately 18 cupcakes

What You Need:
12 Eggs
1 c. Butter, melted
2 tsp. Vanilla Extract
1/4 c. Honey or Maple Syrup
1 c. Water
1 T. of Chai Tea
1/4 c. Irish Cream
1 c. Coconut Flour
1 tsp Sea Salt
1/2 tsp of Baking Soda

What To Do:

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.

Brew one cup of chai tea using the water and chai tea according to package instructions. (I used Rishi Tea Masala Chai loose leaf tea.) If you use chai concentrate, feel free to omit the honey and up the amount of chai used.

In a mixing bowl, whisk together the eggs, butter, vanilla, honey, chai tea, and Irish cream. Sift in the coconut flour, salt, and baking soda in and stir until well combined.

Line the cupcake pan wells with cupcake liners. If you do not use liners,  use pan spray or butter to lightly grease each well. Fill each cupcake well with 1/4 cup of the batter. Place the pans in the oven and bake for 30- 40 minutes.

Remove from oven and remove cupcakes from pan to cool. If you would like, frost or ice the cupcakes. (I used a marshmallow cream since I would not be able to refrigerate them.) Green food coloring would be a better addition to the frosting or icing than the cupcake itself due the dark color of the cake.